I am very open and honest about the kind of relationship I had with my father. He passed away nearly ten years ago after a fifteen year battle with cancer. In the years leading up to his death, I was his support system, but ultimately a child shouldn’t learn, at any age, how much they mattered to a parent at said parent’s funeral.
Today I commend the good fathers out there, though all of my role models on that level are deceased. I wish my cousin a happy first Father’s Day, and I hope that every single Mom out there who plays both roles knows she’s a bad ass.
I hope I’ll be feeling more like myself soon and be back on a more normal posting schedule. I’m not okay, and that’s all I can say for now. I hope everyone had a great weekend. I spent part of my day in Boston visiting my sister, Britt. I’ll be telling you all about her in a future post. Many of you may already know her, but I’d like to tell my side of the story since I don’t know when or if she’ll get around to it. However, I can say it was good. I can’t wait until she comes back. 🙂
Everything I’m writing at the moment is mean and hateful. I’m in a dark place, and I’ve already explained why. Or at the very least, I gave a partial explanation.
Tonight, I am just trying to get through the next few hours and tomorrow, and each day until I hit Monday. I can break down Sunday night, but for now, I have to remain strong.
Today, I am too tired and way too sick to focus on anything. This migraine is a nightmare, made worse by lawnmowers, leaf blowers, trimmers, motorcycles, music, dogs barking, the nauseating heat, and anyone breathing or asking me stupid questions. Pretty much everything smells disgusting to me, except for essential oils and my perfume. And aren’t I lucky that it’s going to be hot like this for the next three days?! UGH! If I can force myself out tomorrow, I am only going out for cat food and toilet paper. That is sad, but it is a fact. I was going to try to do it today, but I’m in no condition to walk from one room to the next, really. Not without assistance. And quite frankly, I have the most useless cats on the planet. 😦 They only want me to feed them. They’ve dispensed with feigning love or interest in my suffering. They sleep in separate rooms, spend little to no time with me, but become obsessed with me when they think they should be fed (If this is what marriage is like, I plan on remaining sans ring and paperwork.). I’ve never felt more unappreciated by creatures I not only rescued, but loved and raised.
To add insult to injury, this is NOT how I want to be spending my weekends; sick in bed, unable to sleep or function. 😦 I’m SO fed up. I have plans next weekend, so even if I do feel like crap, I’m going. Besides, it’s the only thing I have to look forward to for the rest of the year, based on my current calculations.
I hope everyone is having a good weekend!
Today is the first Caturday in a long time where I’m just hanging out, praying for rain because I need the pressure to drop for my migraine to break a little. 😦 Cat has tried comforting me the majority of the day, sitting on me like she thinks she’s hatching eggs, but I can’t move my neck and I’m in so much pain I contemplated murdering the sanitation workers when they came to pick up the trash this morning. I was lying here at the time praying for the pain to end, and the second the truck came up the street, it was as if someone parked Times Square inside my skull. I still can’t get the noise to stop. Yes, people have to live, but am I supposed to just hide in a bunker every day of my life?!
Needless to say, this week has been AWFUL for me. I’m hoping I’ll be feeling better tomorrow for the Grand Opening of Witch City Wicks. I’ve attached the link if you’re interested in hand-crafted soy candles. BLACK Lavender is my favorite, but I’ll probably find some new ones tomorrow, providing I’m feeling okay. It might just be nice to be near the ocean.
I hope everyone is having a good day. I’ll be back ASAP with something new I’m working on.