I think this is so important for people to read and understand. Last weekend I was asked why I was pushing myself so hard. Here’s the answer: No one else knows precisely how I do things, and no one else knows how difficult it is for me to get these things done. They don’t have to live with my pain for a second. I’d prefer to blame myself, and only myself, if there is a missing item or a mistake made (I made a big mistake a few weeks ago and had to return two items that I would normally NEVER screw up, but all it took for me was stress, distraction, and a single moment of feeling overwhelmed.).
I may have horrible days, like today, when I did have to ask for help, but there are many 10+ pain level days when I force myself to grocery shop and run errands because no one else will ever be as thorough as I am. Yes, it bothers me, but I don’t have much choice. When I DO ask for help, people act like I just asked for ten million dollars, so I don’t accept help any more unless someone offers and I feel the offer is genuine.